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How to Complain to God



Nobody needs to tell us that life is tough.  From the moment we come out of the womb, life is full of events that shock our system and challenge our sanity.  Some cynics have said, “Never trust anyone who smiles…it makes you wonder what they’re up to!”  If we take life as it comes at us, it is very easy to become negative and complain about everything.  Of course, constant complaining doesn’t cultivate many friendships.  Most of us know that a positive attitude about life brings a multitude of benefits.  Those in the medical field will readily confirm that a positive attitude is a critical factor for healing.  Even in the midst of great troubles, a positive attitude helps us to count our blessings and seems to make life a little better.  Besides, doesn’t the Bible tell us to “count it all joy…when we encounter various troubles” (James 1:2)?

So when it comes to dealing with our problems, we who are trying to follow Jesus wrestle with internal tension.  On the one hand, we do want to “count it all joy” and face our troubles in faith and a positive attitude.  Such an approach appeals to the “heroic” in our spirituality.  But it can also make us stoic and inauthentic.  We put on a happy face when we’re dying inside.  We “fake it till we make it.”  We don’t share our troubles with anyone because we don’t want to appear spiritually weak.  We don’t complain to people and we don’t complain to God.  But the reality that we are living is something completely different.  We are hurting.  We may face very difficult or even dangerous circumstances.  There may be people who genuinely hate us and wish us ill. 

What do you do with that?  If you bottle it up and just tough it out, frankly, you risk mental illness in the long run.  Does God allow us to complain to him?  Can we accuse him of deserting us or not being fair when we honestly feel that way?  The answer to those questions is “Yes, of course.”  God knows how you feel anyway.  Why hide it from him?  The Hebrew people were very good at complaining to God.  You can find examples throughout the Psalms.  Psalm 13 is a perfect example:

Long enough, God—
    you’ve ignored me long enough.
I’ve looked at the back of your head
    long enough. Long enough
I’ve carried this ton of trouble,
    lived with a stomach full of pain…

That’s the first two verses of the earthy translation known as “The Message.”  These psalms of complaining are called “laments” and they make up nearly one third of the whole collection.  For many of us, this kind of praying seems disrespectful.  We can’t talk to God that way!  But Job did and it opened his mind and heart to a whole new understanding of who God is. 

The key to the psalms is that they always express faith while complaining.  Without exception, every single psalm of lament, somewhere in the text, stops and reverses course.  “How long, O Lord…BUT I trust in your unfailing love.” “You have put me in the lowest pit…BUT I cry to you for help, O Lord.” And from the wonderful little prophetic lament called Habakkuk, “Though the fig tree fails to blossom…YET I will praise you.”  This is a prayer language that God hears.  This is the kind of prayer that will strengthen your faith and transform you.  Just the other day, I was arguing with God. (Yes, it’s true.)  I knew I was wrong, but I just had to get it out there.  And in my honesty and vulnerability, God revealed his strength and my weakness. I gained a whole new perspective and hope in my circumstances.  God will do the same for you when you complain in faith.  The psalms of lament can give you the words that you need.   

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